Oh my freaking god, this is the most "frustrating and annoying and what the hell am I making here and why" project.
Let me sum up:
I hated those ruffle scarves and scoured the Ravelry database to see if I could find a pattern that would use the yarn a better way. I found a pretty shawl pattern, both crochet and knit versions, and thought I would try it.
For three days straight, I kept knitting and frogging, hooking and frogging, looking everywhere for some reason why the pattern just wasn't flipping working. I still have no idea what went wrong, but I found someone who made a Youtube video about it and contacted them and they sent me the pattern for free, which was nice.
It got off to a rocky start, with some kind of weirdness in the center, but then the spiral started and I was SO pleased with myself ... until I crocheted the fabric to itself and had to pull out about 6 feet of it. I went back to it, and kept going until I reached the edge and discovered ...
... it was tiny. Like, really tiny. Big enough only to drape over an accept table. It won't really go over my shoulders. Thank the heavens I didn't pull out all the scarves, just the pink and gray one.
What I ended up with is pretty, but it needs to be like three feet longer. I might be able to rearrange it into some kind of belly dance hip scarf, but even then, I don't really want it, despite the color way being exactly what I wear.
METHOD:
I don't even know. I tried to follow the pattern, but who knows.
AND WHAT DID WE LEARN?
Never buy yarn you don't LOVE and never take the pattern dimensions at face value.